Well, we did it. Unbelievably, amazingly so. We moved. Right now, I’m sitting in our ‘cozy’ (Bay area euphemism for tiny) apartment somewhere in Bezerkly, Caaalifornia. We moved from the city that was home for so many years, home both real and imagined, home both bliss and bane. Bengaluru.
We moved for so many reasons, all practical, well-thought out, but it doesn’t help the goodbyes. Bangalore was getting really rough on my asthma (wait, the increasing pollution was actually one of the *causes* for my asthma), and the craziness of the chaos, the traffic, the change in lifestyles, in attitudes, in the Bangalore spirit, was moving beyond we-can-manage-this-because-we-love-the-city to we-might-love-it-but-we-can’t-cope-anymore. Even our time with the Koramangala Initiative (a citizen’s forum in Koramangala) made us feel that without sustained political will, well-intentioned citizens’ efforts can feel frustrating rather than empowering.
Also, it’s been ten years of working for both Ashwin and me, and we felt the need to reflect on those ten years, and to challenge ourselves in different ways for the next ten. So Ashwin chose to go back to university (‘school’ as they call it here in the usofa), and I chose to finish that darn, never-ending doctoral thesis of mine.
All good reasons. Still hard to say goodbye. So I’m going to resort to what I know to be true: misquoting Bob Dylan always works. Goodbye’s too sad a word, babe, so I’ll just say fare thee well.
Besides, as the Governor of our newly inhabited state (Arnold Shivajinagar) is fond of saying, I Will Be Back. And he’s just following namma Bharatiya samskruti, where you never say ‘I’m leaving’, you always wave tata and say, ‘Bartheevi’, ‘Aashbo’, ‘Varen’, ‘Aathe hai’. We’ll be back. Bartheevi, Bengaluru.
sheesh. it’s “us-*and*-a”.
oh, and walcum.
thankee kindlee… will call, prof. us and a!
Okiiiii you came and didn’t bring gurer sondesh????
arre, we will to be *making* phresh gurer sondesh right here in baarkly. and bhen you bhill bhishit to test it?
Hogi banni, Alo avare!
Z
‘On misquoting Bob Dylan..’
I’ll bet you Bob Dylan would misqoute Bob Dylan if you asked him for his lyrics.He never could remember the exact lyrics of his songs.It’s best to appropriate 😉
I’m guilty obviously 🙂
Rahi: And the answer is blowin’ in the… er… in the… oops. And was that blowing or – dammit – floating? er…
Yes, I can imagine that conversation in a gravelly sotto voce. grin.
My niece is married to a Software Engineer in Chennai, who is also the son of my own uncle (mother’s brother). His harassment, mental torture, beatings, abusings, etc. knew no bounds. She tried to file criminal complaint in Mysore Women’s police station. The police ignore to take the complaint as they contend that the complaint has to be lodged at the place where harassment has taken place, ie. at Chennai. She is now in her parent’s house and is a lactating mother (8 day’s old baby). She is afraid if she lodges complaint at Chennai her husband may dilute the case with his money power, and also it will be difficult for her to pursue the case if lodged at Chennai. So, please advise what she should do at the earliest.
Dear Suresh,
Thank you for writing in, and my apologies for responding late to this. I was away on work, and not able to get online easily.
There are difficulties as you know, around the registration of cases and police stations’ ‘jurisdictions’. In an ideal world – one recommended by the National Police Commissions and various other groups – you should be able to put in a complaint in any police station anywhere in India and have it registered and attended to (at the very least, registered and then transferred to the geographical jurisdiction). This doesn’t happen, even within states in India, at the moment. In your case, it’s even more difficult because you are afraid of having it registered and attended to in Chennai.
I will email you separately, and ask my colleagues presently in Karnataka to contact you and help you with the case, but a few suggestions to others out there who might find themselves (unfortunately) in the same position.
When a local police station (PS) doesn’t take a complaint, for whatever reason, please go to higher authorities who will be able to challenge that decision. ‘Burking’ – i.e. not registering a bona fide case – is a very serious offence in the police system; it can lead to suspension, amongst other things, if proved. In your case, Suresh, it would mean going to the Commissioner of Police, Mysore city, and explaining the situation. Even if it does mean registering in Chennai, if it is done with the knowledge of senior officers both in Karnataka and Tamil Nadu, for instance, that can decrease the level of illegitimate influence you fear your niece’s husband might exert.
Junior officers are also in the unenviable position – which we need to understand – that they feel unable to handle the consequences of decisions like taking a Chennai-based case when that has no precedent in their experience.
In each case, I would advise going to the successively higher authority if the previous one doesn’t prove helpful. In the meantime, writing to the Women’s Commission in your state with or without the support of a local women’s organisation in your area, can also help.
Finally, projects such as the Gender Sensitisation and People-friendly Police Project (which I worked with in Karnataka) are useful entry points for trying to work out a complicated situation such as this.
We will be in touch separately, and do our best to help your niece.